pleased to be p2p faq, yes?

yestone_193394121Am I the only user of my particular P2P that has any experience, and sometimes, common sense?  I find myself fighting the urge to shoot out my computer monitor when I come home to 14 nonsensical messages from brain-dead chronic dope-smokers, but it is taking considerably more effort these days, so I thought I’d put this together to help everyone out.

Can I browse your files?
Yes.  Right click, select “browse user’s files” and wait for them to come up.  You will see “waiting for file list” during this process.

Why can’t I see your files / Why won’t they come up?
Our P2P has a tough time indexing large collections.  Mine fits this category.  Sometimes, when you attempt to browse me, the program will get hung up on the “waiting for file list…” part, and it will show this indefinitely, timing out before it can bring up my files.

THIS DOES NOT MEAN I AM NOT SHARING.

If I wasn’t, it would simply say “no files shared”.

I have been wrongly banned by people who so severely lack common sense that they mistake the two.  Don’t be that guy.  If you can’t get my files to come up, try, try again.  If after several attempts, you still don’t have success, come back and try again later.  Don’t message me.  Really.  There’s nothing I can do about it, and I’ll just get annoyed.

Um, hi… r u there?
Puh-leez do NOT send messages like this.  I don’t reply to them.  It’s not that I’m a jerk, it’s that I’m busy.  I also don’t respond to such vague private messages for the same reason as I don’t return non-specific phone messages.  I don’t like walking into something open-ended without knowing what I’m getting into.

So please: when messaging, have a point, and state it from the git-go.  And for the love of all that is holy, please spell out words like “are” and “you”.  “R” and “u” are SOOO 1996.

Why did you ban me?
Chances are, it’s because when I browsed you, you came up “no files shared”.  Or maybe it’s because you queued over 24 cds or so.  Perhaps it’s because you’re sharing less than 100 files, or because all you’re sharing is p0rn, without any music to be found.  Sharing pro-communist, pro-Nazi, or pro-animal abuse crap is also not tolerated. Sharing files of m4a or any other “secure” proprietary format does not count as sharing, so if this is all you have, be prepared for the banhammer.  It’s all about common sense.  Read on…

Why do you have so many rules?
When you really think about it, I don’t.  I don’t set official limits on how much someone can queue at once, like “1 album at a time” or a daily limit, like “only 2 cds every 24 hours”.  I also don’t ban people for sharing certain artists or types of music, or for NOT sharing certain types of music, i.e. “if you’re sharing any DJ Tiesto, I’m going to ban you”, or “if you don’t have any zero-day releases, you’re banned” or anything like that.  I don’t really care what you share, or what you don’t share, other than what’s mentioned above.

My only rule is this: common sense.  Apparently this isn’t so common, because I ban several people every day.  Common sense means things like, if all of your shares are stored in one big folder and all you’re sharing are miscellaneous single tracks, then download miscellanous single tracks at once–not full organized cds.  Likewise, if you’re sharing full organized cds, you may also download full cds.  If you’re sharing a lot, you can download a lot.  If you’re sharing little, you can download little.

Can you start my download?
No.  What makes you better than the people ahead of you who have been waiting?  Usually people who ask this question are just impatient.  My favorite is when they try to pull one over on me and say they’ve been waiting forever and I haven’t even seen the name before.  Top secret: it doesn’t work.  I’m not that stupid.  I’ve been asked this question so many times that I am so incredibly sick of it that when someone asks me now, I actually delete their queue and let them figure out that they’re no longer in it.  This boots them to the back of the class.  If you simply can’t wait patiently, go get the files from somewhere else.  If I’m the only one who turns up in your search, queue it up and wait patiently.

Why do I keep moving back in the queue?
First of all, don’t get mad at me (I say this because some people do).  Unless you’ve asked me to start your download, I haven’t touched your spot in line.  You need to know two things: first, I have a long user list.  If you’re not on it, the program gives these people priority over non-list users.  Second, you lose your spot in line every time you log off the program, so if you’re crunched for time, stay logged on.  You WILL move up in line, I promise.

So will you add me to your list?
I’ll certainly browse you and check you out.  Even though I’m not picky about who downloads from me, I AM picky about who I add to my list.  If you don’t have a sizeable organized collection that is of decent bitrate and is properly-labeled, or if your upload/download speed sucks, don’t bother.  For as many people as I ban every day, I add about as many to my list.  However, if you message me and your collection is scanty and in shambles, I’ll ignore you, and possibly delete your queue.

I may add to this later, if more questions and answers come to mind.  As usual, I’m sure I’m forgetting something.  But this oughtta satiate about 95% of the private-messengers for a while anyway.

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